The good thing is that we have a spy in Brussels who has insider connections. It's also good that the person is not one of the intellectuals, since he writes, of course, things that have nothing to do with reality, but this does not bother our master spy in the least.

It never bothered him.

Our agent named Ujhelyi discusses at length in his masterpiece published on Index that the EU funds will finally arrive because the Hungarian government has backed down and is no longer faltering in those vital issues - in which it has never been faltering before. Ujhelyi, who is most likely in his last months as a member of the EU, and who has been defeated several times, is trying to create the appearance that he spent his time in Brussels working for the sake of our country, the Hungarians, and now the fruits of his labor seem to be ripening, while he never once tried to speak up or vote for the sake of Hungary. that he would have benefited his country.

According to our built-in enemy, the use of the incoming funds will be strictly controlled by his principled friends outside, examining the invoices submitted by us with a magnifying glass, and if everything is not in the best order, the Orbáns will have trouble.

But Pityuka, this is really good news!

Since it has been examined with a microscope so far, and with one on which only one inscription could be analyzed on the slide: We will not give Hungary money. If they only use a magnifying glass now, they may not be able to read this message.

According to Pistike (and his insiders), in the current case it is about the 13 billion funds whose disbursement - not to mention grossly violating EU law - the European Commission tied to the implementation of the judicial reform. They set conditions that can be classified in the band between the röhej and the pitiáner category, so why wouldn't we have fulfilled them? True, they still had questions, they could be roughly classified into the funny category, such as how big is the judges' office? According to the Commission, the room size is a super milestone for the rule of law, so let's measure it for them. An idiotic question has an idiotic answer.

By the way, I would also include in the information the size of the judges' feet and the memory capacity of the computers they use, let them be happy.

It's lucky that I'm not a politician, because then we'd never see a penny of the money - which I think we won't see now, contrary to Ujhelyi's statement, since the EU coffers are empty.

If it wasn't there, they wouldn't want to collect another small supplement of barely 100 million euros from the member states.

Of course, Ujhelyi pretends that the evil Orbán government has bowed down before the great Union, but he elegantly ignores the fact that, due to the resistance of Hungary (and of course others), this coveted 100 million won't end up in the coffers of the Brussels money-grubbers. Is this called suicide? Pityuka, you lack text comprehension!

According to our spy, after the arrival of the 13 billion, the government cannot back out of the significant salary increase for teachers, which, according to him, the management could have done even without the EU. The smallness doesn't bother him that they will do it, but if the Union doesn't pay, they can only do it to a lesser extent than they could do with the amount owed to us but not paid. He is also not bothered by the fact that the bigger wage increase was decided jointly by Brussels and the Hungarian government, based on the money that has not been paid to date. Why would the Orbán cabinet want to snooze the wage increase, when – if there is a cover for it – they could pull out the venom of the Ujhelyi opposition with it?

Our not-so-smart, but suitably evil man also mentions in his writing that the government has backed down in matters such as the issue of asset declarations.

Oh my God, not even an MSZP member of the European Parliament can be so dumb!

The matter of the asset declarations is the biggest failure in the line of EU idiocies! They demanded of us to change the Hungarian practice, and we adopted the template used in the Union. Which the wits in Brussels quickly determined was not good after all, it's all back. Another issue is that, after realizing that the Hungarian system is stricter and more thorough than the EU one, they did not even think of changing the Brussels one. I wonder where the world would be if the EU representatives could not use the money of the European taxpayers as they please without control! What would that poor Eva Kaili and her companions live on? How could their well-oiled corruption machinery work undisturbed?

Our Pistik is still philosophizing (for a long time) about the rule of law, declaring that the current government does not follow the rules that we accepted at the time of accession, which is, of course, a blatant lie. On the contrary, it is a fact, it can be proven with the basic contract that Ujhelyi and his comrades trample the EU rules in the mud without any problems,

they demand for themselves - and not only demand, but treat arbitrarily - rights that are not theirs.

More simply: they are transferring the methods of the communist dictatorship into practice in Brussels, they want to interfere in the operation of areas with which they have nothing to do. Comrade Stalin, or indeed his Hungarian clone, Comrade Rákosi, would enviously observe everything that happens in Brussels. Comrade Ujhelyi's situation is much better, because he is not a simple observer of the left-liberal dictatorship, but an enthusiastic supporter.

I wouldn't call him a part, because Ujhelyi is such an insignificant figure that he can't even be a part.

I feel sorry for this unfortunate person, because a few months before his resignation, he exerts himself so much that he will...break. What about you, Pistike? What if you drop out of business? What if you don't have a party left by then?

At most, you can return to your original profession and practice law for a while. Not for long, because you are certainly no longer at home in Hungarian law, and the so-called European legal system is not a winner here. There is only real legal order here, even if we often do not experience it that way. And here you can't use the conditionality procedure you mentioned.

At most conditioning, but only in the gym.

Featured image: MTI/Márton Mónus