In record time, the editorial staff of Spiegel realized that Orbán had, in fact, crushed everyone at the EU summit.
Although the XX. had they connected so quickly even in the 19th century, then there would not be a hundred million people and their descendants missing from the continent today. Of course, nothing good will come from the recognition now either, but at least we received information that the nerve root responsible for anger and hatred, which occupies the place of their brain, remained functional. Yes, you can see that Orbán gave up nothing for what he went for.
If they didn't grow up on Grimm's fairy tales, in which the strong always rob and maim the weak, but on Hungarian folk tales that build normal, decent, balanced adults, that don't cause temper management problems and psychological disturbances, then they wouldn't have been surprised by the fact that Orbán is a he recovered our stolen money in exchange for coffee. For us, this is the normal course of things, before the end title, the antagonists even get to know the sword. Only we are not in a hurry.
In the folktale version, the plot unfolded as follows.
The smallest but smartest boy - let's call him Viktor for the sake of genre-obligatory obscurity and non-identification - arrived at the usual ball around this time, where all the knights of the western half of the town were already in a big meeting together with some lobotomized servants who came from the eastern half of the town. They debated with thick foreheads furrowed with wrinkles, how they would share the wealth stolen from others. The smallest and smartest boy went there to get back his ball and bicycle, which were confiscated by the town's blond-haired bachelors on the grounds that our protagonist does not meet their ideal image. He is shorter, his skin color is not as noble as theirs, and his nose is not the same.
These have been the central issues in the western part of the city for centuries, and this has already excited their parents and grandparents, as well as their great-grandparents who were forced beyond the Great Óperencias Ocean due to certain historical excesses. Viktorka was also blamed for her inappropriate behavior, especially the fact that she does not march eastward with the others in the cold seasons, and that she uses the common water of the common stream too often to wash herself and keep her environment in order, as well as
it also produces food using water, instead of exchanging products produced with slaves imported from foreign lands for food produced on foreign lands.
So it happened that Viktorka stumbled into the ball, where the others were conferring, and there she declared without question that although her ball and bike and some other belongings were stolen, she certainly wasn't going to give away the chestnut in her pocket. There is no god, ideology or perversion they believe in. The western boys immediately wondered what this precious chestnut could know, as the news reached them that the boy had been treating everyone in the market for days by saying that he had chestnuts.
Maybe you can use it to abuse others, to cause eternal misery all over the world?
they asked each other heatedly, blushing.
They also put their heads together in İzı, to see if they could achieve more together, what to do now.
After much deliberation, they came up with the idea of telling Viktor that the chestnut was theirs. They really pissed themselves off when the little boy just shrugged his shoulders at the suggestion that the chestnut would definitely stay in his pocket, no matter what they say about the ownership conditions. They retreated to consult again, this time they came to a decision quickly. They sent forward their strongest, most battle-hardened companion, Olaf, the One-Eyed One, who for years had only appeared in the company of a sharp briefcase, to get the precious chestnut by cunning and trickery. (Olaf was nicknamed the ill-intentioned half-wit behind his back, but unfairly: he was the only one among the lads who could add numbers up to ten with the help of his fingers.)
"You, Viktorka, don't be such a jerk and jealous!" If you don't give the chestnut yourself, we'll get it in exchange!
- he addressed the little boy in an ear-splitting voice that does not tolerate contradiction, which is unique to him. After the echo of his thunderous words had disappeared in the walls, he looked back and winked at the others: the matter is on track, they will soon have a whole chestnut.
- How do you imagine that exchange, because I have no idea what could be worth as much as an undamaged, whole, polished chestnut with a warranty card?
Viktor asked back with deep sincerity and incomprehension in his eyes.
"Listen, we'll give you your ball and bike back, and I promise that we won't be violent with you for a while, maybe we won't even rob you while the chestnuts last."
- Olaf made the figure gentler as much as he could.
"I negotiate hard, that's for sure."
– Viktor wiped the sweat from his forehead, then continued
"I don't believe the latter, you've promised something like this before, but that's fine, there are more of you and you're also violent." I surrender, here are the chestnuts, yours!
- with that, he turned around and left the meeting with his belongings. He was accompanied by mocking, hurtful laughter, which he even heard in the chestnut trees on the way home. But it didn't bother him, since he had the ball and the bike, so he happily started playing football with the hundreds of chestnuts lying on the road. Leaving the chestnut, he couldn't take it anymore and burst out laughing. Not even caring that someone might be watching, he shouted out loud:
"These are so stupid that next time I'll take two chestnuts, and I'll get everything back with that." And I threaten them that there will be no more theft and robbery, because then they can throw a crescent moon on the chestnut supply.
This is the end, run away with it!
Of course, the tale polarized and hushed up some small things. For example, that the secretary of the village, the mustachioed Vonder, who for some reason believed himself to be the merciless but just lord of victorious wars and endless countries, already felt very uncomfortable while guarding the stolen and looted belongings entrusted to him. He knew that what he was doing was illegal, since according to the rules laid down by the founding fathers of the city, it is forbidden to rob each other, saying that this is the secret of peaceful coexistence. Therefore, after a while, he returned some of the goods to their rightful owners. But Viktor trusted more in himself and his own mind than in the common sense of the many violent, stupid, evil and strange-smelling residents who dominated the western part of the city.
So the story isn't over yet, but we're having more and more fun. They don't understand, let the Spiegel editorial office look at the chestnut for many weeks, why they needed this so much. They'll figure it out anyway.
Featured image: Facebook/Viktor Orbán
