Imre Bedő, the founder of the Men's Club, reveals the not-so-complicated secret of how someone can become a good husband and father.

As the author of three bestselling books, many people ask me how to become a good father. Often even how to be good husbands? There's a secret: you don't have to focus on that, that's not the question. Life gives automatic answers to these questions for those who decide on something much more important. The secret of secrets is simplicity!

The kind of father (husband) you will be depends largely on your circumstances - what you add to it is partly up to you. The roles of fatherhood and husband also depend - primarily - on your wife.

With a different woman, you would be a good father, a good husband, in a different way.

The details that make up the whole, your reactions, your actions depend on the character of your children, your health and financial condition, your living environment, your age and many other things. Every constellation of circumstances can bring out of you the decisions, behavior, and actions that make you a good father and husband in a new and new way. Moreover, all these circumstances change (just think of your wife), so you must change as well. How could I suggest a paved road, a checklist that can be checked off, handrails that anyone can blindly follow? A general prescription is required. A recipe based on which everyone can prepare success in their life according to their own individual circumstances!

Which also means that we can't expect this from anyone else, we have to see it for ourselves, alone.

But then what makes us good fathers and husbands?

We need a simple corner point that does not depend on our circumstances. As Archimedes said, we need a fixed point. He demonstrated the supreme power of the sure point by saying that the whole world could be tilted from it. On the contrary, I recommend finding this as a basis for maintaining our (otherwise) tilted world!

We need a central value in our lives, an organizing force of absolute priority that determines all the others.

Around which and to which everything revolves. Compared to that, everything is easy to understand. As a result, our life does not drift like an unproductive mass of amoeba, but instead turns to fruition along this - single - central value. And this law is simple. Family comes first!

The miracle lies in the fact that I can decide this alone, no one else is needed! But I have to decide on my own! But if I accept it, it starts... Everything.

For those who make "family first" the central value of their lives, their schedule, priorities, and areas of responsibility suddenly become clear. His cooperation with the woman, the victim of the workplace, gains meaning and content. He is overwhelmed by the all-surpassing certainty of fulfillment in the building of the infinite. Everything is completely different, but everything will become self-evident after such a decision.

Because for those who put family first, they have established a sure point along which they automatically make good decisions, generate good reactions, and take good initiatives both as a father and as a husband.

Then he goes home, notices this too, solves that too, says so and so, and represents the value system in every situation that is born from this root and nourishes it as well. And as if by magic, day by day, step by step, a good father and a good husband are born. And by living according to this simple law, it will always remain so.

Gaining the woman's respect, gaining confident self-esteem and serving as a good role model for posterity.

So let's learn - even - from the example of Don Corleone. Even the now absolutely classic "Godfather" as a mobster, made his cruel and terrible figure digestible, almost likable, the human line that elevated him to the ranks of men to follow, that his life was governed as a rule by the law of "family first". And if we want to do a counter test, let's also taste that the workplace comes first! Fun comes first! Money comes first!

So nothing else is needed, just a decision. The secret of secrets is simple. Family comes first! Go fathers, go men! Happy Father's Day!

Source: Facebook page of the Men's Club

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