Dear Progressive Europe! We, the undersigned Hungarians from the highlands, respectfully announce that we are collectively homosexuals, lesbians, bisexuals, pansexuals, asexuals, transgenders, transvestites, cross-dressers (we have no idea what this is, but it can only be good, because it comes from the West), in addition, deer, merry-go-rounds, etc... so that we, five hundred thousand, have become all these from today.

We did this almost of our own free will, because based on our experiences so far, we, as an indigenous national minority, are just a moth to the EU, i.e. nothing and nobody.

After all this, we respectfully ask the almighty Brussels to deal with us as a real problem, as a "real" minority.

No, we don't want a third toilet, we don't want to sensitize children in kindergartens to gender change, we only resorted to this flick to hold a mirror up to you.

Look into this mirror! You promised us after 1998 that if we voted to join the EU, we would receive European-level guarantees for the growth of our own minority life. But you already knew that they were lying to us. It is true that the Catalans, South Tyroleans, Basques, Galicians and other national minorities fought for their rights in their own states, but you promised that Brussels would help us in this national struggle.

Well, after all this, we are just saying this: we have no intention of adapting to their aberrant social policy, according to which an ISIS fighter disguised as a refugee is worth more to you than a pensioner in need of care, an Antifa zombie protesting against his own kind is worth more than a churchgoer he is young, and a knee-jerk is worth more than a proud patriot, and a transvestite is worth more than a decent family man.

So we have learned our lesson: we can only rely on ourselves and we will continue to do so after this, because there are a few of us here in the Carpathian country who stand together and do not kneel before you, and we do not mind if there are more and more identity and gender changers among you, be it the hermaphrodite or deer, we will only ask these individuals not to chew our garden plants or jump out in front of our car!

We regret that we believed you and wasted our time on this misconception.

We hope that after this we will not receive another collective punishment, because we still have the old bug on us.

God bless you in your beautiful, new world, and we will push for the thousandth time to save ourselves in the Felvidék, as well as in all the other separated areas, because this is our Hungarian destiny.

(Sándor Papp/ Felvidék.ma )